You’re in doubt. You don’t know what’s going on – what even is right and wrong, anymore?
Living in this modern world where values are basically forgotten and everything is for “clout”.
This is not how I ought to live my life. This is why I value patience, perseverance and (sometimes, slow) progress so much. There is nothing more real than something which grows, especially when compared to something which is just flung at you.
I guess my analogy is almost like, hm… making your own homemade mashed potatoes. The potatoes have to soften first, and then you can add your other ingredients which will enhance the taste. But you still have to mash it – things aren’t easy, some effort is required for this (especially if you’re as tiny as me). Now, that meal is going to taste so much better than simply, buying that instant, powdered mash potatoes they sell. Trust me.
Let me tell you something, you need to listen to your energy. Don’t let cloudy negative thoughts be the reason for your decisions. Neither, positive over-optimistic thoughts. The answer here is to find the balance.
It’s so hard to know what you really want, when life doesn’t stop to give you a minute to really think about it. Or, when it does, you get another curved ball thrown at you. Bloody brilliant, you know?!
You’ve gotta go with what feels right.
So you need to look at what makes you happy, brings meaning to your life, challenges you (earn that bacon), and what you can survive on. Also, who you can truly cherish, support, push, be honest, disagree with occasionally but at the gain of learning from, growing and having fun with.
Everything in life seems to have this push and pull relationship. You need a job that you can push yourself at and reel in the rewards. The same with a partner. A partner you can push forward, but who can also pull you up (and/or vice versa).
How do i know what feels right/wrong when I am uncertain about whether I’m making the right choice?
Well, you’ve got to remember, just as you can’t control your thoughts, you also can’t control other peoples. They have minds of their own. Even if your ideas of them exist in your mind. They’re passing – they come and go and they’re just ideas. Why would you want to make a decision on something which only you think feels right, when that thought is around. You wouldn’t.
The simple trick seems to be to focus on knowing yourself.
It’s not easy at all, but i say it’s simple because in the long run, even though getting to know yourself takes time, effort and a lot of reflection – this is way more simple than trial and error’ing your way through life.
Nowadays, people are hooked into this mainstream culture where they use terms like “we move” and “you only live once”. These terms just prompt (mainly) young people to lose their values.
What is the point of living if you’re not growing? If you just keep running away from your problems because “we move” – it’s as if you’re wrongly giving yourself false accreditation – that because you buy something new or fail to give another chance out of pride, or whatever, this means that you’ve one upped someone… when really, you’re just delaying all else. Nobody is perfect, but living in this way actually appears as if you’re living according to others’ means. Not your own.
You’ve got to come back to yourself at the end of the day.
Yes, we do only live once – i think, this is why you have to find what you love and really pull out all the stops for it. Don’t let anything hold you back. If it’s not meant to be, it won’t be. But if it is, have patience and it’ll be yours, you don’t need to try and one up others. If anything, you can invest more in yourself for your own personal development. This will make you stronger: mind and body. Little things like this can engage your energy and allow you to optimally use it in the right way.
Also, remind yourself why you’re still here – in whatever situation. If you can’t escape something, maybe you’re running away from the wrong things. Align your focus. You’re not alone, don’t be scared. Change your perception to what you’re scared of, and watch how life will gift you. Your energy is your gift. Use it wisely.
**disclaimer** I know I talk about energy a lot, but these are my own personal opinions – I’m not saying you should believe in this. At all. But try it – if you want, or don’t. It might surprise you, it might not.
I guess, what I’m trying to get across here is:
1. You are the only you in the whole world. Stop following everyone else. Discover yourself and watch yourself shine!
2. Don’t make decisions in haste. Ever. You could really fuck things up.
3. Your energy can really communicate to you. Be that through your nervous system or even in your dreams. Make sure you can notice when it’s not your pure energy speaking to you though.
4. Good things sometimes take a lot of time. Don’t throw something away because it wasn’t actualised yet. Learn to grow with things/people. You may be surprised – it could lead to stronger foundations.
5. Patience really is a virtue. If you believe, somehow, something will return in your favour.