how I feel today #3

Today was stressful, I spent the previous day working on research for my independent project and I realised that the gap in the research i had identified was too much of a challenge to do at undergraduate level.

I spoke to my supervisor who said, that if I was a phd student, it would’ve been great and I would’ve been encouraged to look into it. But I’m not a phd student. I’m an undergrad student.

It’s a known trend of myself to be good and complicated things and it’s easier for me struggle when things appear TOO simple things. Little did I know, that this too would be a problem at university. But it’s okay, because by 12pm, I had rectified the mistake and another solution was proposed. I spent the rest of the afternoon flicking through research and formulating a better bigger picture in my head, as this helps me to understand not only what I’m doing but the reasons behind it too. Something detrimental to keep me motivated.

Stress is useful for me to get my ass into gear. If an environment is too relaxed, I don’t operate well, I get curious about learning all sorts of other things and my focus spreads. But when that bout of stress comes, I literally can work weeks of research into a few hours. Although today was tough, I nailed it.

All in all, tomorrow is going to be a busy day. I’m going to attempt to do a little work on each of my modules coursework AND some time aside to work on my empirical project. Let’s goooo!

Published by C. De Sousa

Literally talking to myself through this blog, but enjoy.

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